NVC Monthly Newsletter

December 2022

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Featured Update - New Title!

Nonviolent Communication Toolkit for Facilitators

Effective communication is key to any culture of change. The Nonviolent Communication Toolkit for Facilitators is a one-of-a-kind resource that provides uniquely comprehensive training and support for trainers who are leading the way to a more inclusive and compassionate world.

The Toolkit for Facilitators contains:

• 18 Key NVC Concepts
• 21 Learning Aids
• 33 Handouts
• 20 Short Video Clips

By reducing the page count by over 100 pages through design and layout choices we were able to preserve the valuable content and offer this title at $29.95 reduced from $75.00. Our goal is to make this valuable content more accessible in addition to important environmental savings of paper, water and industrial waste. 

A Message From the Authors:

“The three of us long for peace on our planet.  We wanted to contribute in some way.  We created the toolkit because people were asking us for more activities, beyond sitting in a circle and talking.  We wanted to create interactive activities that would help build the consciousness of NVC in multiple contexts, including prisons, communities, organizations and public institutions.  People were also asking us to support them as they developed their ability to use language to live the intention and consciousness of NVC.  To do so we created materials with examples and scripts that would help people develop the language and develop their own authentic voice in living NVC.  Our goal, by offering these activities and materials, is for the reader and practitioner to develop a deeper understanding of themselves and in turn, a better understanding of others.  When you are able to care for yourself, you are also able to care for others.  These are the knowledge, skills and awareness that the work with the toolkit offers.  The NVC Toolkit is now in over 65 countries.  We sincerely hope that it is useful to people who want to learn and share NVC."

Learn More!

"Remember that the happiest people are not those getting more, 

but those giving more."

Jackson Brown, Jr

Articles

Be Careful What You Hear During the Holidays - Marshall Rosenberg

If you want to enjoy your life, particularly during high stress situations, I would strongly recommend you never hear what another person thinks.

I think you will enjoy life better and you will enjoy other people much better by following this rule. Especially never hear what they think of you. Especially that.

But if you really insist on making life miserable for yourself do this: think of what you are. Think, for example, whether you’re normal or abnormal. Appropriate or inappropriate. Attractive or ugly. Intelligent or stupid.

Every second that you spend thinking of yourself, what you are, I predict you won’t be enjoying life very much. So, if you really want to be miserable spend moments of your life thinking of what you are.

Read More

The Holidays: 6 Mindful Communication Tips for Peace on Earth by Oren Jay Sofer

Spending time with family members over the holidays—the season of “good will to all”—often can be challenging.

Family gatherings may reveal a widening canyon of personal, political, and cultural differences; table conversations can halt in tense silence or devolve into explosive argument. Instead of gritting your teeth to get through the meal, here are six tips for more mindful conversations during the holiday season.

Read More

How to Really Have Happy Holidays! - Published on Work Collaboratively

We have more social engagements (all those holiday parties and events), and preparations for the holidays—shopping, cooking, and decorating. And those we’re often hanging out with can sometimes be the most challenging people in our lives, be they immediate family members or in-laws, or the boss at the holiday party.

The holidays can be easier and actually fun, even in challenging situations. Here are a few bonus tips based on NVC and coaching practices.

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5 Tips for Enjoying Your Family Gatherings - Beth Banning and Neill Gibson

Are you wondering how your next family gathering will turn out? Is it tough to relate to some of your family members? Do you sometimes leave feeling drained and wondering why you went at all?

It can be different this year. Imagine walking into your next family get-together feeling excited about being there and knowing that you will leave feeling happy about the whole experience.

It's your choice. Here are five tips for making your next family gathering the experience you've always wanted.

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Using Nonviolent Communication to Come Home to YOU for the Holidays - Ann Scott Dumas and Machelle Lind

Many of us are motivated to create a holiday season that is memorable and heartwarming. This quickly becomes a list of gifts to buy, treats to make, events to attend... but under all those starred “important items” there is one thing you may not find... and it’s deeper contact with YOU.

Most of the self-care we see advertised is about indulging ourselves. While a bubble bath, glass of wine and scented candle may get us started, they usually don’t fulfill our deeper needs. Nonviolent Communication (NVC) makes the bold assertion that the most deeply satisfying activity is to respond to real needs—our own or those of others. But to respond to a need effectively, you have to have some clue as to what it is.

Read More

The Home for the Holidays With Nonviolent Communication - Navigating Emotional Pitfalls - Lisa Gottlieb

For many, the holidays are less a time of joy and excitement than a season marked by provocation and disappointed. If you are on Instagram, Facebook, and other social media sites, it can look like everyone is having a wonderful time out there except for you. Even though we all know that what people typically post online is a highly selective slice of life, it can still create longing for the happy holidays that many of us never really had.

Mix all that with today’s political climate, the societal pressure to overspend, and the stress and aggravation of travel, and being with family during the holidays can often be the scene of conflict rather than contentment. Apart from dealing with all of the difficult people that every family seems to include, the aspect of getting together with family that can be the most troublesome is falling back into the familiar roles we have played with each other since childhood.

Read More

Cooking up Peace This Holiday Season - Jan Henrikson

The rumors persist, but Julia Child never actually dropped a turkey on the floor and put it back in the pan on national television. Her unabashed jubilation over food and all kinds of cooking adventures makes it feel entirely possible, though.

In the movie, “Julie & Julia,” Child is in ecstasy eating food, preparing it, sharing it. Her husband oohs and ahhhs over each taste she offers him. The same is true for Julie Powell. Powell is the writer who embarks on a quest to create one of Child's recipes a day for one whole year. Her husband and friends seem to melt the moment her duck or chocolate soufflé rolls onto their tongues.

Read More

Book Specials

The Healing Power of Empathy

Collaborating in the Workplace

Dementia Together

Compassion in Action

"Kindness in words creates confidence. 

Kindness in thinking creates profoundness. 

Kindness in giving creates love."

Lao Tzu

Handouts

"As we struggle with shopping lists and invitations, compounded by December's bad weather, it is good to be reminded that there are people in our lives who are worth this aggravation, and people to whom we are worth the same."

Donald E Westlake

Book Excerpts

Reach the excerpt here

Read the excerpt here

Read the excerpt here

"As we push around buying presents, we must always remember that 'our presence rather than our presents' is one of the greatest gifts we can give."

Catherine Pulsifer

Video

Vision of the Future - Marshall Rosenberg

Learning

The NVC Academy offers hundreds of affordable online personal growth courses and resources to learn Nonviolent Communication from home.

Visit the NVC Academy

The Center for Nonviolent Communication (CNVC) is a global organization that supports the learning and sharing of Nonviolent Communication (NVC), and helps people peacefully and effectively resolve conflicts in personal, organizational, and political settings.

Visit CNVC.org/Trainings

"The joy of brightening other lives, bearing each others' burdens, easing others' loads and supplanting empty hearts and lives with generous gifts becomes for us the magic of the holidays."

WC Jones

Songs

Shower the People You Love With Love | James Taylor

"Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice."

Dave Berry

Peaceful Daily Reflection

Stay Connected to the Values of Compassion With the Free 365 Daily Peaceful Living Meditations.

I spent much of my life wanting more intimacy, joy and connectedness, and I wanted other people to provide them for me. At one time in my life, I was frustrated because in staff meetings the participants weren’t connecting with each other as much as I wanted them to. This didn’t meet my needs for integrity because Compassionate Communication had taught me how to create deep connections.

I felt a great deal of pain around this issue for months. Then, one morning I woke up with a message running through my head: “Mary, if you want deeper connections, then connect! Don’t expect other people to do it for you.”

I started to argue with myself. “Oh, I couldn’t do that. I’m embarrassed. What if no one else wants to connect? What if . . . ” What was it I wanted again? I want to be more connected with the staff in our meetings. Finally I got it. I wasn’t willing to connect with them but I wanted them to connect with me! I had set up a difficult situation for my colleagues and myself.

So, with a great deal of fear, I attended the next staff meeting with an intention of connecting. I did this for the next three staff meetings in a row. Two participants mentioned how much they appreciated my behavior and how much it helped everyone shift their attitude about staff meetings!

Is there something you would like more of in your life right now? Try not to look to other people to provide the kind of experiences you want. Can you think of a way that you can be the change you seek? Be those experiences yourself, and then watch the miracle of transformation happen.

Make a conscious effort today to respond to the people in your life 

the way you would want them to respond to you.

Sign Up for the 365 Daily Meditations

Learn About the Book Here

NVC Additional Resources

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